The reason this well-laid plan backfired is because while all the other girls fall over themselves when they see exactly what it is I am looking at and get all trippy for a love story, my particular lexicon makes the same message they are receiving sound like a joke!
Take for example when the women sat around discussing His rather novel 'arrival' in '96 (or was it '97?)
They went gaga over it and went on about the incident like it were the hottest romance novel at the local bookclub meeting.
I got the distinct impression that He 'landed' in the backyard and about the only penetration that took place was His passing through my closed French Doors on His way out, stopping briefly to make sure I am aware of His presence and to intimate, 'Don't touch my face'. ('don't touch my face...don't look at my hands...' makes me wonder is there any part of Him not off limits to me?)
And on the way out He manages to get every appliance and electronic gadget to act up.
The Romantics at the round table discussion get all sad about it, saying things like, 'She thinks He left her...' (Well--yeah, but He finds other means of engagement, check out the expression on the Lost Bunny of the Apocalypse's face; just too precious).
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| Prickly City Cartoon Panel Dec. 14, 2011 The Lost Bunny of The Apocalypse's Wife Comes Forward |
And more cooing from the peanut gallery, "She doesn't know Who He is?" "They don't recognize each other!"
Their hearts are in the right place, those sentimental dears, doesn't everybody get to buy into the fairytale pap ever since they r knee hi to a grasshopper?
That's why the ruse generally works, well it did in every case until now.
The failure due in large part to Miss Interpretation (that would be me, not perfect enuf to get Translated like the rest of ewes, so I have to sit here and Interpret for myself).
Take for example if our protagonist were to say something like, "Me déshabiller!"
All the love struck bunnies would swoon--seeing the perils He withstood to get to Her; or, if shallow like me, at just what a hottie He Is!
But what they understand to mean, "Undress me!" she takes to mean, "I Am This Idiot! ( me dis (a Brooklyn 'this') habeel هبيلc!")
And when she dashes off a message to apprise Him of this Revelation, (if not to Him directly, then to SomeOne she knows will forward it), He writes back, "Don't yell at Me!"
To which she blithely responds (without sending), "WHO INVENTED CAPS LOCK?!!!"And He volleys with, "...little girls should not use so many exclamation marks!"
Which leaves her speechless and with nothing left To_Do but k-p duty and start peeling onions from Chicago vis-a-vis Calcutta_Kingston (link) in response to His final dig search phrase "you're not supposed to do that" (Dec 6, 2011) so she can get a handle on what exactly she was not supposed to do, while contemplating what page(s) He lands on when He searches "quotes about being let down" because Google Analytics takes more than 8 hours to compile that information?
How's this for a been-let-down quote, and u can quote me, "Krift hayati wa izmikt hayat ad.dunya."
Strangely enough, i still find it easy to remain upbeat, not because i am hopeful things can get better, but in knowing no matter what comes next i've lived through worse.
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