Ahh 2B A Stah

I was trying not to post anything new in 2012 and simply spend the rest of my time completing earlier posts; some of which were set aside while new ones were started, some of which had work lost mid sentence and the material could not be readily recalled for completion.

But here are a few thoughts on what others (them) think.

Let me preface what follows by saying that I am not in the best frame of mind--hard day having to digest the confirmation that I am step-mother to my own children; my grandchildren are afraid to so much as look at me--God only knows what they are being told about me; my hair is falling out in clumps from spending too much time at 0G and not due to my jumping for joy, but being hopping mad; I still hear random individuals take the liberty of pronouncing my name to whomever/whatever Unknown is on the other side of the phone (Skype)line when I pop into my neighborhood Starbucks (I had avoided going there for several weeks and then when I ventured in again that Mr Oh!G still could be overheard doing the same); then to have that one individual actually wake me from my sleep by calling me from within my private room.


Look, if I so much as suspect that voice as coming from a man or woman I've come across I have no reason to trust them, because, well because this and still no reasonable explanation (so whoever knows this much about me is by default automatically implicated in the crime and that's why no signal from outerspace, see I can ignore them just like they did me and then some, because I can do it on multiple levels)!

I find myself still making excuses for noises and pressure changes in my car, trying to rationalize what's weird, and the flashes I see while driving or going about my daily so-called life are not because they are shooting my picture but whatever it is I know Who to thank for what I've been calling migraines.

So this post is all about apertures. Openings, or 3ayns, like our eyes where light enters, and anuses where skutt leaves, and why never the two 3'ayn shall meet.

Overheard at, where else but the salone of the 21st century, coffee shop a man was explaining to someone how it is the very nature of the human brain to be the center of its universe-- to make everything in the world about that individual and why everyone, no matter who they are, or what they say, all want to be a Star! Not a Planet, or Blackhole, or some other Space Debris, but a Star--and not as a destination-- no wonder we are all still stuck here on (multiple) Earth.

Spoken like someone who only knows everyone in Los Angeles. And this man's sweeping assessment of everyone's basic nature and true character is nothing more than the projection of probably his own aspirations onto everyone else.

After all if he wants it, then surely doesn't everybody else?

Are they any better than what he thinks?

Can they possibly be any different?

The Argyle Sweater Feb. 21, 2012
"Why Would Anyone Try Not to be Noticed?"

What? Why? Are they aliens?

Well, unlike him, I can't speak for everyone else. But some of us, me, a handful of friends, family, and acquaintences don't seem to want that. Some of us do-- the ones born and raised in LA, but on the whole we don't spend time even thinking about it. Not that we can't appreciate a Star when we see one. I enjoy a reason to dress up and see a show as much as anyone, but that  doesn't mean I want to be in every production!

My Mother, for example, all she is ever on about (when she catches sight of me, anyway) is 'Land! Land!' and I'm like 'What on Earth is Her preoccupation with Land?'

True, its rising up out of the Water is fascinating, but that trick got old after the first time.

Speaking for myself, its not so much what I want as much as what I don't or didn't ever want--any problems. Because then I would be forced to have to sit down and try to solve them and that leads to just one math mistake after another (and then HE wipes out the final touches to my antenna).

And for the gentleman who thought he was channeling my Father on his way out the shop by telling me to "Study!" That's like the last thing my Father would ever adjure me to do, in fact He once emphatically told me I do too much reading and studying and to make His point stick, He literally threw the book at me (it was Calculus).

"Books have led some to learning and others to madness."
--Petrarch