Pairings

Someone did a search with the following string and landed at telepathy101.blogspot.com :

"what should a girl do when a man is communicating by mental telepathy? "


In an ordinary world, the answer is obvious, you let nature take its course; but under extraordinary circumstances, say, because every cell in your body has been manipulated to oblivion and each of you is married to someone else and you don't look anything like the tail he is chasing around his office and you're not short on cash or company, you do what the Big Voice in the room tells you to do and you "Get Out of The Way-Now!"
Not surprisingly, the Quran offers just this type of tailor-made approach to problems; a fix to suit any occassion.
As an example, let's take Abraham's concern and the way it's handled as recorded in Sign 2:260.
{Ok. Ok. What He, the 'Big Voice' in the room, actually Said (but in the interest of brevity I gave a sound bite); "I Will Not Let you Fall. I Want you to get dressed (not what you all may think-- I was getting a medical exam) and Leave. NOW! You'll not see him again.} (In response; I got dressed, left the examining room, called the elevator, made it to the parking lot, got in the car, started the engine, fastened my seatbelt, exited the building and made it to the street in less than 30 seconds flat! And as I drove off I could 'see' that my departure was lightening quick because it was just then that the doctor was just making his way back to the examining room and rushed to the elevator bank only to find that I was gone without a trace---date of the incident on or about October 5, 1996 at around 6 pm. Who was the doctor speaking to about my medical condition on the phone in his office having established that it was not me, not the Owner of the 'Big Voice' (the Big Voice was kind o' neat, but what clinched it for me was seeing a demonstration of Your 'ability to commandeer the pixels' on my flatscreen tv at home and scroll messages of a personal nature in 30 inch lettering across it while knowing there was no dedicated private feed to our basic cable subscription), and not my spouse who was with me during part of the exam and had just left to to pick up the kids, and later found out it was not my lawyer, and not my other treating doctor, either? That pretty much elimates it being any body else's business. And now that You are all tied up in Nots, The Real Question Remains; More Importantly than What Planet am I on-- What Kind of Game are You Playing?)
And, get this; some time later, maybe years had gone by, I contacted a young lady who gave psychic readings by phone out of her home in New Jersey. Something about her seemed genuine. She did not ask me for anything other than my name and payment information and started her reading. She had never met me before the night of that 15-minute consulation; she couldn't get a bead on who the mysterious caller was, but she did say; whithout any prompting from me whatsoever; 'We All Saw You Leave That Night, We saw you leave him and he went after you as far as the elevator bank.' I asked her who was the caller, who are We that saw all this? She could only say she speaks spontaneously when she gives her readings and does not really know what is the nature of the information or who is providing it.)

Chapter 2 The Calfوَإِذْ قَالَ إِبْرَاهِيمُ رَبِّ أَرِنِي كَيْفَ تُحْيِـي الْمَوْتَى قَالَ أَوَلَمْ تُؤْمِن
قَالَ بَلَى وَلَـكِن لِّيَطْمَئِنَّ قَلْبِي قَالَ فَخُذْ أَرْبَعَةً مِّنَ الطَّيْرِ فَصُرْهُنَّ إِلَيْكَ
ثُمَّ اجْعَلْ عَلَى كُلِّ جَبَلٍ مِّنْهُنَّ جُزْءًا ثُمَّ ادْعُهُنَّ يَأْتِينَكَ سَعْيًا
وَاعْلَمْ أَنَّ اللّهَ عَزِيزٌ حَكِيمٌ 2:260

2:260 And when Abraham said, "Lord, show me how you give life to the dead." (God) Said, "Do you not Believe (accept it as True)?" (Abraham) said, "Yes, (of course), but so that I am reassured (with) inner (certainty, in my heart)." (God) Said, "Take 4 birds and train them to obey you, then place a portion of them on each mountain and call them; they will seek you (come to you) at your command (in order); and know/teach that God is Wise, Powerful."

So, Abraham learned by similitude of Falconry how it is that God Resurrects the Dead.

And, word apparently got out about my culinary prowess, so the same Sign 2:260 is a convenient Recipe that I plan to try for tonight's dinner:
2:260 And Abraham (his daughter) said, ”Lord, show me how to adapt (this recipe) and bring life to this dead (chicken)!” He said, “Don’t you believe (it can be done)?” (She) said, “Yes, but to insure the inside (is cooked).” He Said, “Take the thighs/legs of 4 birds and ground them up, then take a portion of that and knead it with a couple of figs (play up to your taste, ie season to your liking) and (grill until) there is a mark over the highest part (of the fire); and invite them to dinner and they will come in an orderly fashion; and know Your God Is Provident (Compos Mentis when it comes to you) and very Powerful (because at any time He could Swat you like a fly).”

{I substituted 1 lb. ground chicken breast for the legs and minced a couple of dried figs for the fresh and formed them into cutlets, seasoned with salt and pepper and a little dry tarragon then grilled them and they turned out moist and lovely; my family complained about the sweetness, but I balanced it with tart heirloom tomatoes for a side and made Panini sandwiches with provolone cheese out of the cutlets; they were quite nice. It turns out I have a bunch of finicky eaters at home and I hope the substitution wasn’t committing sacrilege, but the dark meat may have stood up to the figs' sweetness better, and next time maybe leave out the terragon.}

And You, Dear, get a buggy program out of it (Just what You need, right?)
وَand
إِذْ while
قَالَ declare
إِبْرَاneedle /cursor/pointer بْرَ land/ground
هِيمُ main
رَبِّ raise/increase/collect/gather/accumulate
أَرِنِي show me /display/
كَيْفَ how to alter/revise/copy/rework/adapt
تُ to
حْيِـيneighborhood/vicinity/
الْمَوْتَى endless /death/infinity

قَالَ declare
أَوَ Or
لَمْ Round up/gather/collect
تُؤْمِن accept as True; or تُؤْTau مِن from/of

قَالَ declare
بَلَى Yes; or بَ with; لَى twisting/torsion
وَ and
لَـكِن while is
لِّيَ twisting/bending/torsion/contortion/bending/flexion/
طْمَئِنَّ reassure/check
قَلْبِي inner/core decrease; invert/flip/transform B (or the center?)

قَالَ Declare
فَخُذْ take; thigh/leg (of a right triangle)
4أَرْبَعَةً four, tuple-4
مِّنَ of/from
الطَّيْرِ whatever flies around
فَصُرْ grate/cut into small pieces/differentiate
هُنّ from/of
إِلَيْكَ to you; to torsion/flexion/twisting...

ثُمَّ then
اجْعَلْ mark/locate
عَلَى on/to
كُلِّ each
جَبَلٍ maximum
مِّنْهُنَّ among them/key or most important of them (presumable the key vector)
جُزْءًا portion/section/slice/fraction/piece/bit/parcel

ثُمَّ then
ادْعُهُنَّ call them/execute the function

يَأْتِينَكَ come/comes/ (it should yield (this is a guess, any 2 pairs in order))
سَعْيًا in order/sequence
وَاعْلَمْand know/teach
أَنَّthat
اللّهَ عَزِيزٌ حَكِيمٌ God is Wise/Sage/Provident/Separate/Discrete and Powerful/Exponential

My first sloppy take, since I don't know what I'm doing:

Do While (2, 260)
Declare Cursor = 0, **The main pointer/needle set to
ground/ and other values needed for this algorithm**
Display [Value];
//**How to adapt the Area (local neighborhood) from the Infinite** (Big O?)

Declare [A,B]
Or //**Round Up, Collect; ie sum up the vector space
with torsion?**
Direct Sum ΠUT= ATÅBT
Check True? //I don't know
what/

Else
//make sure the Inner/Core is diminished, is this some sort of
topology investigation?//
Declare Tuple-4 (a, b, c, d)//4 of whatever is
flying around//key vector
a=c sin A = c cos B
b=c sin B = c cos A //the
legs of a right triangle//

σaθb {R} //select Key Vector/help!//
d/d(R)//cut them into pieces, discrete values, differentiate
/help!--someone must have already developed this algorithm//
//locate/mark
the maxima
//then call /execute

Print [A,B]
Declare //God is
Wise, Powerful//

Laugh if you like, but I am not the programming genius here and You have your work cut out for You...

***As a general observation, your airfoils sure fly slow around here**

A Day At The Beach

Sometime in 2001

Him: Look at you, waving at that helicopter as if they can see you!

Her: They came out of nowhere--I was just letting them know that I can see them.

Him: To them you look like a drop of rain in an Ocean…do you mind if I ask why you are just sitting in your car, why you don’t step out and walk down to the beach. It’s a beautiful day!

Her: Not feeling well.

Him: Why? You don’t look like there is anything wrong with you.

(Protracted silence)

Him: What exactly is wrong with you?

Her: I had a toxic exposure… I have a headache…they say it’s asthma…it feels more like seizures. (With every packet of information she is forced to relay her agitation grows more evident; she had come here to withdraw and not have to deal with people only to find this random passerby with nothing better to do but engage in conversation).

Him: Oh…I see…where was the explosion?

Her: There was no explosion, just a slow chronic buildup of toxins in a tight building where I work…

Him: Yes, but when was the explosion? There is usually an explosion in these cases (he says pensively).

Her: (slowly shaking her head No).

Him: Where do you work?

Her: Government office.

Him: (Nods knowingly) I see--Government! Do you see that building there? I think that it is a government building (he casually points to a lot across the street)

Her: There is no building there…(the irregular knoll didn’t appear to be large enough for a 2-bedroom home let alone a government building and the strictly residential neighborhood was far too opulent).

Him: Sure there is, don’t you see the drive way; the access road around the back?

Her: Excuse me, I am going to open the car door now and step out. He backs up to allow the door clearance.

Her: (Looks at the spot he had pointed to and Wonders what he is talking about, clearly there was no building standing there) No, there is no building there that I can see.

Him: Well, perhaps when you come back in a few years…my name is John, by the way, what’s yours?

Her: RXXXX

Him: AXXX?

Her: No-- RXXXX.

Him: SXXXX.

Her: (Exasperated by now at having to repeat her name 3 times, and wondering how he can know her older sisters’ names) It’s RXXXX.

Him: Oh! RXXXX! (He says while at the same time shifting the expression on his face and his voice to look and sound just like her late father)

Her: It was nice to meet you, John, I think I’ll go down to the beach and catch a prayer.

Him: (He holds out his hand and they shake hands farewell, then he resumes his initial demeanor) Good-bye…for now. (and he winks impishly, so quickly that she doubts seeing him wink).

As John watches her make her way down to the shore and he realizes exactly how she finally got the help she needed, he laughs his head off!

Zits Comic Strip by Jerry Scott & Jim Borgman as it appeared in the June 4, 2010 issue of The Los Angeles Times.

A large building nears final construction on the site in question as of this blog entry date; but somehow I am disinclined to believe the chopper or its occupants had anything to do with my mother.

Word Problems

If you take the time to plow through this blog, you may become convinced that there are several different ways to see or understand the same exact thing; not simply due to different view points (remember Bob and Emily?), but because it is the Way in which the Message propagates throughout the multiple levels of Reality.

But preferring not to deal with esoteric arguments, there are concrete examples of how this multifaceted approach works in our everyday (collective) life.
A specific case in point would be how we think of the Moon and its orbit around the Sun. I found a good discussion about this at The Orbit of the Moon Around the Sun is Convex! , and it serves as a good example for this post about Word Problems.

Summarily, there are some who believe the Moon’s orbit around the Sun is loopy, having negative curvature at times, and others who think it traces some elliptical or circular path, when in fact (in a 3 or 4 dimensional context) it approximates a convex polygon with rounded corners.
Based on a sidereal month the polygon would have about 13 ‘corners’ since 365.25 days to orbit the Sun/27.32 days per month in orbit=13.37 months per orbit.

There are those who believe that God Creates With His Words, and others who profess His Applied Language is Geometry or Calculus; but some of us have discovered that God does all of the above because He likes working out Math Word Problems.
Someone recently hinted that everybody already knows what the problems are and that one’s efforts are best directed at finding more solutions. The short answer is ‘ewes guys shore expect a lot out of 1 brain cell clinging desperately to all the missing parts of its anatomy.’ But even in this situation, the old adage holds that ‘If you give a man a fish, he eats for a day; but if you Teach a man how to fish he eats for a Lifetime (and can feed others).’

So, learning how to get a solution is more important than just providing someone with an answer, because then they can find out answers to things they think important and not just settle for solutions to things someone else feels they should know.
This is where it gets personal; during my school years, I remember having to work out Math Word Problems from as early as grammar school (thanks to Mr. Comer, Principal, PS 229; and for all those Irish Blessings that at first glance looked like curses), then deliberately throughout middle school, and by the time high school and college rolled around it seemed every math problem was initiated with a word problem.

We were not given math problems to merely hone technique or just math’s sake but the majority of the problems were tied in to real world phenomena and required having to depict or translate the narratives into mathematical relationships.
This is where those of you following this site get to LOL because you see how abysmal my math skills are right now, but that won't keep me from trying; I know I have forgotten the bulk of all that I learned—I even forgot how to integrate, but somehow I have to make this work…

And having put two children through school I am surprised at the limited exposure they each have had to applying the math they learn by solving word problems. It was only until they each reached beyond Algebra II that their textbooks or homework assignments included a slim number of word problems that they needed to work, if any, and not until Calculus did working word problems become common.
The trick is to learn how language describes math, as simple as ‘and’ means ‘+’ and ‘a collection’ means ‘a set’; higher level concepts would be like ‘marry’ means ‘unify’ and if you are working out a problem in physics it may mean ‘equalize two strands before splicing (uniting, adding, linking, merging, etc)’ ; or the word ‘soul’ may mean ‘any one' or ‘nonphysical, i.e, imaginary' entity.

Why such an emphasis on solving word problems?
For the simple reason that 'a picture is worth a thousand words'; it is simply a fast way to get a detailed concept across to a large audience in a language everyone can understand.

This is best illustrated with an example:
(وَإِنَّا لَجَمِيعٌ حَاذِرُونَ (26:56
(وَجُمِعَ الشَّمْسُ وَالْقَمَرُ (75:9
Signs 26:56 and 75:9 are written in Arabic, a language that only about 4% of the present day world population can understand.

The first translation in English (a language spoken by about twice as many as those who can understand Arabic) works out to:
26:56 And, truly, We are Wholly Vigilant

75:9 And the gathering of the Sun and the Moon
And the interpretation of these same Signs in arithmetic syntax works out to:

26:56 And, True, We are Discretely Computing/Adding Up/Gathering
75:9 And combining/calculating the 'Center of the Orbit' and the 'Time in Months'

The words discrete and calculating and adding up do indicate some type of integration is taking place.
The Sun is a metonym for the point around which other bodies revolve or the 'center of an orbit' (aka focus); and the Moon is the only natural Earth satellite and is closely linked to timekeeping.

In fact, the words moon and month are cognates and a month was used by early civilisations to mark out the natural time period of the Moon (in fact, some languages use the same word for both Moon and month, like in Farci 'mah').
Based on the foregoing, it's not a major leap to think that Sign 75:9, in addition to its prima facie message, is also a math problem. If one were to follow the arithmetic syntax and use a handy-dandy computer program to do the integration, such as the ubiquitous but quasi-reliable Excel tool, it becomes evident the problem is basically calling to attention the geometry of the orbit of the Moon around the Sun and what happens if one were to integrate or sum up the discrete values (given by the Sign numbers 75:9) from 75 to 9.
What is not clear is whether these upper and lower bounds are to be taken in Degrees or Radians (), or simply Time.
To keep the math manageable, an approximate circular orbit is assumed but that shouldn't keep anyone with more time and better tools from working out the case for an ellipse. The radial plot and the edge view (line chart) along with the calculations appear below.

Both the Radians v R and the T v (cos ^2 + sin ^2) plots are generated based on the assumption that the Moon's orbit is given by (400 cos t+ cos 13t, 400sin t + sin 13t) with the Sun at the geometric center (the focus).


The line graph depicts a close-up of the edge view and shows that the curve undulates (has 'rounded corners') without any negative curvature...


...and I hear someone say, "So, what?!" and another call "Dibs!" and Old Faithful say, 'F#*$ me!'...


The Radar plot T v R^2 indicates that a sector about 1/3 of the whole is missing. Interestingly, there is a beltway that partially circles Lexington, Kentucky evocative of this undulating orbit (generalized ellipse unwrapped from a conic surface for more than one period with interval length 2pi/k) with a similar size bite taken out of it:


________________


Depeche Mode
Policy Of Truth song lyrics
Songwriters: Gore, Martine …

It's too late to change events
It's time to face the consequence
For delivering the proof
In the policy of Truth
Never again
Is what you swore
The time before…

You'll see your problems multiplied
If you continually decide
To faithfully pursue
The policy of Truth
Never again
Is what you swore
The time before …

Surely there must be saner ways to go fishing (get it--de peche mode?)!

I guess somebody out there doesn't like working out Math Word Problems or feels threatened by something as simple as my commuting home, and that's why I have included the image below that has nothing to do with what I am on about here. And it also occurred to me (with a great deal of sadness) that nobody gets what this is really all about since I am having to deal with this type of tomfoolery still.


Just because I am slow to anger, does not mean that I don't get angry; and just because I prefer to walk away does not mean that I am chicken. But I know now why I don't see them coming, I guess it would give me a rather sizable unfair advantage. But then, that's what Mikey is for and I take back what I said earlier about your artwork Michael, please feel free to submit it prolifically; and I don't need to hear any more about my bunker mentality since after this morning's commute it appears to be well founded (the angle of incidence was absolutely perpendicular to the direction of travel (vehicle speed about 70 mph)--did You see who did it?--And, it's no use trying to break the news to me slowly and gently when the kids blurt it out at the breakfast table).

Building A Mystery

"Those in the know, Know;
...to everybody else it's just a stack of hay!"--My Mother

I know, I know, getting through A Page In The Life must seem like one must have their 'vorpal sword' ever at the ready, but there is more to language and meaning and interpretation here than synonyms, antonyms, and homonyms. A vorpal sword is a weapon used to slay the Jabberwocky and it surprised me that it recently made the Times Crossword puzzle a couple of days ago which brought to my attention another poem from Alice In Wonderland that was a spoof of the poem Speak Gently by American poet David Bates, the last two stanzas follow:

Speak gently! -- He who gave his life
To bend man's stubborn will,
When elements were in fierce strife,
Said to them, 'Peace, be still.'

' Speak gently! -- 't is a little thing
Dropped in the heart's deep well;
The good, the joy, which it may bring,
Eternity shall tell.

In some parts of the world, and I still think there are some parts of the world, the word 'Um', which can sound like 'Im' depending on one's accent, means 'Mother'. And if something has the attribute of being the 'mother of a thing' it means that it is the quintessence of the thing. Keeping this in mind the word 'im.possible' takes on a whole new meaning, and something that conveys no possibility whatsoever comes to mean 'the mother of all that is possible'---endless possibilities.
During the opening scene of The Bee Movie, Jerry Sienfeld's voiceover shares with the viewing audience that science says it is impossible for a bumblebee to fly based on the laws of aerodynamics, but the bee doesn't know that and it flies anyway. According to Wikipedia, this common misconception that bees "violate aerodynamic theory" traces its roots back to a 1934 French book Le Vol de Insectes by M. Magnan wherein he concluded that according to his application of equations for air resistance to the flight of the bumblebee, their flight could not be explained by fixed-wing calculations and that "One shouldn't be surprised that the results of the calculations don't square with reality".

But in fact this merely confirmed that bees do not engage in fixed-wing flight, and that their flight is explained by other mechanics, such as vortices and non-linear effects caused by the rotational rapid beating of bees' (and other insects' ) wings that are a vital source of lift. The vortices allow the bees to borrow energy from the swirls/vortices that form around their wings during flight.

It turns out that bees rotate their wings before starting the return stroke, and the wings are lifted by the eddies of air created on the downstroke and this high frequency oscillation of their wings means that many hundreds of vortices are shed every second to form symmetric vortex street patterns. Vortices inherently create drag and bees can recapture some of this energy and use it to improve speed and maneuverability.

Aerodynamics is simply a specialized study of general fluid dynamics, and on earth the most common fluids under flow are water and wind. Hydrodynamics explains water's action and the Aeolian processes describes wind's activity; more specifically, the winds' ability to shape the surface of the Earth and other planets. The wind erodes, transports, and deposits materials most effectively in arid environments such as deserts and in areas with sparse vegetation and a large supply of unconsolidated sediments. While water is a much more powerful eroding force than wind these types of aeolian landscapes are greatly influenced by the aeolian process and are ever changing and shifting with the wind; unless one can get the wind to 'be still'.

Wind blowing across the desert makes for shifting sand while wind blowing across a string makes music. The Aeolian harp is driven by the von Karman vortex street effect since the motion of the wind across a string causes periodic vortices downstream that cause the string to vibrate. The sounds from the Aeolian harp are random depending on how the wind blows.

In music theory, the Aeolian mode is the sixth mode of the major scale and has the formula 1, 2, ♭3, 4, 5, ♭6, ♭7; basically, five whole steps and two half steps. Led Zeppelin's Achilles Last Stand is arguably one of the finest contemporary examples of this classical music mode.

But our purpose here is not to harp on about aerodynamics, vortex streets, or aelonian music modes; eeeventually, as you may have come to expect, it all ties into what is really on my mind, and that is while many things may at first appear to be random there is no escaping that the apparent randomness may in fact be a ruse to disguise some very careful planning by an as yet Nameless One (let's call Him 'God'). {And Dear God, I know the fact that I am writing this means that I was forced into having to make a decision that Solomon himself could not adjudicate, but what the hay-- I will just keep on this track until I hear otherwise...}

قَالَ رَبِّ اغْفِرْ لِي وَهَبْ لِي مُلْكًا لَّا يَنبَغِي لِأَحَدٍ مِّنْ بَعْدِي إِنَّكَ أَنتَ الْوَهَّابُ 38:35
فَسَخَّرْنَا لَهُ الرِّيحَ تَجْرِي بِأَمْرِهِ رُخَاء حَيْثُ أَصَابَ 38:36

38:35 (Solomon) prayed: "My Lord, forgive me and grant me a Kingdom (Dominion) that will suit none other after me; for You are the Grantor of Bounties.
38:36 Consequently, We Subjected the Wind to flow gently at his (Solomon's) behest wherever he willed.

Controlling the Wind turns out to be quite a powerful force since with the proper guidance it can literally change the landscape; and the Quran depicts as much. Choosing to open with Chapters 25 and 42 and then follow with Chapters 47, 51, 56, 60 and 69 all in a row and then applying the method developed in an earlier post, A String, A Ring, A Modulos Thing, but proceeding by tens (decans) rather than singly, a similar table was established as the one for clock math in A String, A Ring, A Modulos Thing.

Surface charts and Line charts were drawn using Excel by choosing the parameters SModC, CModS, SModC/C and CModS/C in chapter order based on the decans in each chapter; 10, 20, 30..etc, depending on how many verses were in each of the selected chapters.

The data points used are the same for each chart, but the rotations for the first and third charts are x= 35 deg; y= 15 deg, z=0, perspective =5 deg; and for the second and fourth charts the rotations are x=140 deg; y= 15 deg, z=0 and perspective =15 deg.

Interpretation varies depending on the rendering, but the two surface charts resemble encampments and American Southwest landscapes (similar to the ones depicted in Eyvind Earle's lithographs) and the two line charts are remeniscent of buildings and pyramids, respectively.

And to make a long story short, this method was pursued for the first 20 chapters and the data was taken in sets of 19 until Something went Flying Off The Page.




---among others.
The Cummulative Summary charts for that particular excercise appear below as a line chart (music to my ears), Radar chart (see low order projective plane, affine transform) with the x-y axes switched (where have I seen that before?), and a Radar plot which looks like a dipiction of the 'All Seeing' Magic Eye (Iris).

_____________




The results segregated in groups of 19 without rotation:












===========Alright, Who's The Wise Guy? ...

Recall that 1 Radian is approximately 57.29 degrees.

Vive La Différence

It's funny when oui Americans try to speak French...mais non.

Before I go again, I think my Dad pbuh wants to weigh in on something:

"I have three daughters, there is my eldest, the very pretty smart one (John
met her); and the younger one, the reallly good speller (he heard of her, but doesn't want to meet her); and then there is my youngest one (meeting her was no picnic in the park...more like a day at the beach). After we had her we could only have sons. Of all the people in all the worlds she is the last one to be crazy. For the simple reason that she does crazy consummately well.

(She is a nondrinker, nonsmoker, non-recreational drug user, whose idea of a
soul vacation is to get out of school fast, become gainfully employed
in her own field, and marry for love (not money) and give birth to two children
while helping to keep her husband's fledgling business going all before she
turns 30--yes, she has a flaw--she can't cook.) 

Here is my impression of her crazy act: She is hale as a prize horse and rarely ever gets sick until one day she goes into a doctors' office complaining of an obscene amount of pain everywhere in her body and brings along a can of stuff she thinks caused it since she is some crazy kind of a chemical engineer who picked up her degree from some first rate school in New York City on a full scholarship (proud dad, can you tell?) and deduced she is suffering effects from having had a toxic exposure, only to have the doctor tell her she is crazy for coming in to his practice over the course of the past several months complaining of and being diagnosed with a host of various other ailments including but not limited to: 

asthma, tacchicardia, allergies to everything including histamine and anti-histamine, aggravated sinusitis, irregular monthly cycles, joint problems, swelling, migraines, hypersensitivity to light and sound and climate and other
neuropathy, mammary and lymphatic cysts, sleep disturbances, nausea, DTs,
skin tags that behave strangely by practically growing 2 cm during a shower and then falling off 24 hours later, and a host of other dermal, respiratory,
digestive, neuropathic, psychomotor, neuropsychic, non-viral non-bacterial kidney infections, and other systemic aggravated sinusitis, irregular monthly cycles, joint problems, swelling, migraines, hypersensitivity to light and sound and climate and other neuropathy, mammary and lymphatic cysts, sleep disturbances, nausea, DTs, skin tags that behave strangely by practically growing 2 cm during a shower and then falling off 24 hours later, and a host of other dermal, respiratory, digestive, neuropathic, psychomotor, neuropsychiatric, non-viral non-bacterial kidney infections, and other systemic maladies...but then there was also blue tinged nail beds, tears that burn her skin, out-of-body experiences, strange auditory effects that her toddler also reacts to, and yes, hallucinations that she knows are hallucinations because they are after all accompanied by screaming cluster headaches and otherwise known as aura

 ...never mind that her lab tests are abnormal, there is blood in her sputum and any medicine she is given makes it all worse! and her hallucinations get so vivid that they dress really natty and pull up in their SUV's in the middle of a busy intersection not only hearing but following directions coming from her auditory hallucinations and her kindergartner sees them and wonders aloud 'why do they look funny?' and the doctor tells her she is crazy and crying out for attention and deftly gives her a referral to see a psychiatrist.

And when it becomes clear to her the doctors do not or cannot help she makes an appointment to view her medical records because they made her doubt her own mind and she thinks she needs a reality check; and when she shows up as appointed some wild dog of an HMO administrator goes off on her and doesn't keep her wild dog thoughts to herself when she tells my daughter to take the elevator back down to hell (where presumably she came from) and calls the cops and tries to place her under false arrest for cussing and threatening her staff; but when the cops show up they see my daughter doesn't have enough breath in her body to even speak; so the officers threaten to have the wild dog of an HMO administrator arrested for attempting to make a false arrest if she does not comply with the law and give her a date and time to allow her access to her medical records; and one officer offers to walk her in on that day if she thinks they are going to give her any more trouble (she wrote him a letter to thank him)

On her return visit, she notices some key visit(s) are missing from her chart and nowhere to be found (not then, and here it is about 15 years later, and so far not ever; something did surface about 10 years later but it was more like creative writing and not what she knew took place during 'that very strange visit').

Things deteriorated quickly from there since being crazy pretty much kills a marriage where she comes from (not hell) and the only reason her husband and she stay together is because of a promise he made to me that he would take care of her and neither one of them has the heart to tell the kids (who pretty much figured that much out, but for their own reasons still prefer both parents under one roof over any other option).

And that's why We All Landed In The Psych Ward, and why everybody else on the planet gets to do crazy before she does."

...here is the subtext for those of you who keep insisting it is worth the risk; it is not that Michael doesn't eat but that he had not yet had the opportunity to wash up, since he was still in the paint during our little lunch...

I guess now you can all see why I love my Dad (and my Mom--someone please ask her to stop saying 'Land!' everytime she sees me, I find it a oui bit disorienting) so much; and why the usual manner of coming and going doesn't quite suit me...I mean, do I want to be 'born again' and have some other nice lady poop on my head? Or worse yet, be made to forget that I have my own children (surely no matter how awful my cooking it does not warrant that kind of punishment)?

That's why nothing short of a full Resurrection (Being Borne) will do; and in the matters of both coming and going, this is how we roll:

Surah 17 Al.Isra (Travelling)
وَقُل رَّبِّ أَدْخِلْنِي مُدْخَلَ صِدْقٍ وَأَخْرِجْنِي مُخْرَجَ صِدْقٍ وَاجْعَل لِّي مِن لَّدُنكَ سُلْطَانًا نَّصِيرًا 17:80

17:80 And say: "My Lord, Admit me a good/honest/truthful Entrance (Way In/Entry) and release me/allow me to depart in a good/honest/truthful departure; and grant me from Your Power an Authoritative Victory.

Surah 22 Al.Hajj (The Pilgrimage)
لَيُدْخِلَنَّهُم مُّدْخَلًا يَرْضَوْنَهُ وَإِنَّ اللَّهَ لَعَلِيمٌ حَلِيمٌ 22:59
22:59 He Will Admit them in an Entrance (Way In/Entry) that Pleases them and indeed, God is Aware (Knowing), Patient.

And that, Dear Children, brings us back around to the topic of UFOs (You Flying that (those) Object(s)?):

17 Al-Isra (Travelling)
سُبْحَانَ الَّذِي أَسْرَى بِعَبْدِهِ لَيْلاً مِّنَ الْمَسْجِدِ الْحَرَامِ إِلَى الْمَسْجِدِ الأَقْصَى الَّذِي بَارَكْنَا حَوْلَهُ لِنُرِيَهُ مِنْ آيَاتِنَا إِنَّهُ هُوَ السَّمِيعُ البَصِيرُ 17:1
17:1 Extol/Exalt the One Who Captured/Seized/Took/Captivated His Servant one night from the Holy Mosque (Ka’ba) to the Farthest (Most Remote) Mosque (Majid al’Aqsa in Jerusalem); whose precincts We Blessed; so that We Can Show/Demonstrate to him some of Our Signs that Indeed He, and Only He, Is the Hearer, Seer (All-Hearing, All-Seeing).

And why, while it may seem like I am blabbing secrets all over the globe, I publicize tightly guarded secrets with the confidence of knowing not a single word gets out except to those already in the know or the ones it is meant for:

وَإِذَا قَرَأْتَ الْقُرآنَ جَعَلْنَا بَيْنَكَ وَبَيْنَ الَّذِينَ لاَ يُؤْمِنُونَ بِالآخِرَةِ حِجَابًا مَّسْتُورًا 17:45
17:45 And if/when you Read/Recite the Quran We Create between you and those who do not believe in the Hereafter a Secure Barrier (Invisible Cloak, Secret/Hidden Veil...)

and it's all in Good Spirit...

وَيَسْأَلُونَكَ عَنِ الرُّوحِ قُلِ الرُّوحُ مِنْ أَمْرِ رَبِّي وَمَا أُوتِيتُم مِّن الْعِلْمِ إِلاَّ قَلِيلاً 17:85
17:85 And they will ask you about The Spirit, say: "The Spirit Is At God's Behest and you have not been given knowledge/information about it except a little."

___________________________________________________

"In women, courage is often mistaken for insanity."--Doctor in Iron Jawed Angels

A Bunny, A Ba, And The Boy Next Door

The Book of Bunny Suicides: Little Fluffy White Rabbits That Just Don’t Want To Live Any More, by Andy Riley (2003), is an excellent example of dark humor that strikes just the right combination of pathos and innovation. Although there exists both written and oral records in history suggesting that suicide has been in man’s behavior repertoire from primitive times on, the word ‘suicide’ did not exist until the seventeenth century; instead the phenomenon went by more descriptive appellations reflected in Latin phrases, such as vim sibi inferre (to cause violence to oneself), sibi mortem consciscere (to procure one's own death), and sua manu cadere (to fall by one's own hand) and in Early English phrases such as self-murder, self-destruction, and self-killer—all phrases emphasizing suicide’s association with the act of murder.

According to Suicide Basics:

Near the end of the nineteenth century, Émile Durkheim's Suicide (1897) established the field of sociology by offering the first comprehensive theory of suicide. Durkheim's theory postulated that two basic social forces exist and interact within any society—regulation and integration. Societies that were chaotic and confused produced "anomic" suicides; societies characterized by excessive constraints were likely to develop "fatalistic" suicides; societies in which the individual felt alienated and separate would have "egoistic" suicides; and in societies in which there was overidentification with the values or causes of a person's group, the suicides would be "altruistic." Durkheim's theory stimulated a continuing array of sociological statistical investigations. It has been modified in innumerable ways, none of which seriously challenged his basic underlying theory. In both the Old and New Testaments suicide is mentioned in a forthright manner, neither condemning nor condoning the act of suicide, if one were to go by the relevant passages: Samson brought the temple of the Philistines down upon himself in order to kill his captors (Judg. 16:28–31); Saul, facing capture, disgrace, and torture in a defeat by the Philistines, fell on his own sword (1 Sam, 31:1–6); and Abimelech, not wanting the disgrace of being killed by a woman, killed himself (Judg. 9:54); Ahitophel chose to hang himself after he supported Absolam's unsuccessful revolt against King David (2 Samuel 17:23); Judas Iscariot simply "went and hanged himself" (Colt, 1991 p.153). Islam condemns suicide with great severity, calling suicide a rejection of the Divine Will, which is expressed in many different ways and to which humans must submit themselves at all times. {It's only politeness that makes this last statement sound like anybody has any real say in the matter since willingly or unwillingly, sooner or later, they all come to realize it is God's Will}. {Since the main underlying causes behind suicide have been effectively identified as far back as 1897 and they all appear to be readily manageable, there appears to be no reason for suicide (of any kind) to be prevalent in today's societies, yet it continues to plague them; or did I just forget what planet I am on?} In an attempt to prevent suicidal passengers from leaping onto train tracks, the East Japan Railway Company installed a large, stainless steel mirror in one of its Tokyo subway stations. The purpose of this innovative method of prevention is to make people see their reflection in the mirror and think twice about their suicidal behavior.

While Mirrors are a modern attempt to make those bent on suicide reflect deeply before proceeding, the Ancients were known to try Persuasive Poetry as a deterrent. Ba is the Ancient Egyptian word for Soul, and a relatively well-known ancient poem by an unnamed writer known only as 'The Eloquent Peasant' is said to have been commissioned by King Meri-ka-re to write a poem in order to dissuade people from committing suicide. The manuscript The Dispute Between a Man and His Ba, dated between 2000 and 1740 BC , appeared on papyrus in hieroglyphics (a sample of which is shown here) and it relates a conflict between a Man, who wants to commit suicide to escape a society that had fallen to ruin, and his Ba because his soul threatened to leave him should he commit suicide. His Ba informs him that to die without any hope of Resurrection and to be consigned to a life in pergatory would be worse than the most unbearable living conditions, and the man finally convinces his Ba not to leave him.



You might be wondering 'What does she mean by this suicide mish-MASH?'--well, Steve, it was only a matter of time before I got around to you.



M.A.S.H. was a popular tv series in the 70's and the lyrics to the M.A.S.H. theme song, Suicide is Painless (Mash Theme Song) by Mike Altman and Johnny Mandel go something like this:

Through early morning fog I see Visions of the things to be The pains that are withheld for me, I realize and I can see... (chorus) That suicide is painless, It brings on many changes And I can take or leave it if I please... And you can do the same thing if you please.

August 2, 1981 (July 29, 1981?) was heralded around the globe as the day of the 'Fairy Tale Wedding' between Lady Diana and the Prince of Wales. And while all the televisions were tuned in to watch the spectacle and the pageantry of the Princess that finally (as it turned out many years later almost) got her Prince and watch the Parade, the Carriage Ride and gaze in wonder upon the Bridal Dress and feel priviledged to see the Church Ceremony; somewhere in a little hamlet across 'the pond' in New York City, a quiet middle class neighborhood was roused from slumber by the wails of a little boy bemoaning the loss of his Big Brother.

Not nearly as rare a spectacle as the Royal Wedding since little boys often lose their Big Brothers, but the day Steve was discovered having committed suicide the entire neighborhood block woke up dead that morning.


Surah 16 Nahl (Bees)
أَمْواتٌ غَيْرُ أَحْيَاء وَمَا يَشْعُرُونَ أَيَّانَ يُبْعَثُونَ 16:21
16:21 (created beings) They are Dead, not Living, and they sense not when they will be Raised.

Painless? Perhaps barely a footnote in the annals of History unless you get clued in to the background story, maybe true-- maybe a fairy tale, or perhaps life on another planet.

Because, you see, on the planet Earth the story of the girl and the Boy Next Door typically goes something like this:

He is erudite and handsome and worldly and she is a little shy, pretty and urbane. They walk home from school together as children, and share their peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and inside jokes about the other kids. One day they grow up and realize they are so close knit they seem to be opposite sides of the same cloth and they seal the deal with a little garden wedding of their own and live happily ever after.

Screeech---here is the same story about the Boy Next Door in the alternate Universe where I am from:

Yes, he is handsome and fully aware of his beckoning good looks, but nothing about him conveys that he has every right to be conceited; not his deliberate leisurely gait, his always crisp and clean yet understated attire or his quiet tone of voice when speaking to his mother. He keeps to himself and is rarely seen hanging around the neighborhood since he is a young man at the first light of manhood, about 20 years of age or so; he always has some place to go, exciting people to see, something worthwhile to do. He is the first born son to an elegant English woman and a connected Italian-American man.

The girl next door is barely coping with her teenage angst, she is under some sort of informal house arrest because her father woke up one morning in a cold sweat having dreamt that a man had kidnapped her--his younger daughter. Why that would be a problem is beyond her since she has 5 other siblings and she is only a middle child; but she keeps busy by cracking jokes with her mother at the kitchen table, watching back-to-back Star Trek episodes and keeping her nose in a book, since her siblings relentlessly taunt her about her awkward looks. She gets the biggest room in the converted attic which happens to have the best greenbelt view of all the rooms and looks out onto the main street.

On the eve of August 2, 1981 she is having trouble falling asleep and while she is typically an even-tempered, even mellow, and emotionally a generally happy kind of girl, she is flooded with sadness. Tears well up in her eyes and she can't figure out why, nothing in the day could have triggered it. Her days were all pretty much the same: wake up, go to school, study really hard, cheer on the home team, practice with the other majorettes, or take in a few laps with the track team and then the usual routine at home (see above). She's tired and wants to sleep but she moves to the window and looks out. She finds herself standing there, looking, looking, looking for what?--everyone is asleep.

Nothing is moving in the street, the stultifying summer air doesn't even rustle the leaves. It's nearly 2 am and she is agitated, anxious, confused and most of all sad. Then she sees his car inching around the corner and realizes why--it's Steve, the Boy Next Door and he is coming home for the night. His car is moving at a very slow rate, turning the corner for home with the same lassitude as someone moving through the bog; it must have taken Steve an agonizing number of minutes just to round that corner for home and his was the house on the corner.

She sees him pull into his garage and when he gets out, he's all just shadow and he quietly goes into his house. She is having trouble breathing and the blood runs cold in her veins and her head hurts, she thinks she should ease up on the soda pop; but nothing breaks her vigil. She waits.

He is a quiet man from a quiet family, she knows she can't hear anything inside the house; but she sees (her house is two doors down and her line of sight is blocked by a neighbor's house--so how is it possible she thinks she sees what's going on in their home?). 

His father is there, Steve is upset but he doesn't disrespect him; somehow she knows it's not about curfew at his age. She hovers. Steve is despondent; tonight Steve broke up with his girlfriend not because he didn't love her but because tonight Steve was being 'invited' into the family business. She wants to get out of the house and do something but doesn't know what to do (imagine her banging down some mafioso's door during the wee hours of the morning)--everybody will think she is crazy!

Once the father and son thing is over, his father retires to bed and Steve lingers in the living room. He waits--she thinks, an hour maybe 2, she is still up. 

She didn't know Steve liked Chemistry. He takes a chemistry textbook with him and goes and sits in his car. 

He reads. She thinks she is overreacting and lies back down in bed but still no sleep. She has a waking dream that she is floating above the city and she is very sad and knows now why she is crying--Steve would rather die than join the family business. 

Sometime between 4 am and 6 am, Steve decided to close all the doors to the garage and stay in the car and set the engine to run idle while he quietly leafed through a chemistry textbook; a final consideration to allow his mother the sliver of a thought that it may have been an accident (he didn't leave a note...maybe he just fell asleep while reading in the car?)

وَيَوْمَ نَبْعَثُ مِن كُلِّ أُمَّةٍ شَهِيدًا ثُمَّ لاَ يُؤْذَنُ لِلَّذِينَ كَفَرُواْ وَلاَ هُمْ يُسْتَعْتَبُونَ 16:84
16:84 And one day We Shall Raise from every Community/People/Nation a Witness/Martyr** and then the disbelievers will have no leave, nor will they be able to make amends.


 وَيَوْمَ نَبْعَثُ فِي كُلِّ أُمَّةٍ شَهِيدًا عَلَيْهِم مِّنْ أَنفُسِهِمْ وَجِئْنَا بِكَ شَهِيدًا عَلَى هَـؤُلاء
وَنَزَّلْنَا عَلَيْكَ الْكِتَابَ تِبْيَانًا لِّكُلِّ شَيْءٍ وَهُدًى وَرَحْمَةً وَبُشْرَى لِلْمُسْلِمِينَ 16:8
16:89 And one day We Shall Raise from every Community/People/Nation a Witness/Martyr** from their midst (among them) and We will make you witness over them (the Witnesses); and We Revealed the Scripture to you Expounding (Making Clear) every matter and a Guidance and a Mercy and a Blessing (Glad Tiding) to the Believers (Faithful).

Which part of my life is worth repeating? Maybe the part where we get to find out who bears the brunt of the bigger joke, me or Michael (pbuh)?

Because, You See, Michael, that 'man' that my father thought absconded with me in his dream way back in the 80's, he had described him to me and the rest of our family when he woke up that morning. I will not give up the details of your physical description (my dad took them to his grave and I am pretty sure i did too), but he basically looked just like the Michael who insisted we have lunch together in 1992--that's why I refused vehemently, but since it was Imperitive--what else could I do? (I suppose if one must be kidnapped what better Guardian/Kidnapper than Michael) 

The same Michael that ordered way too much food for two people and proceeded not to eat any of it, because He had been Asked to give me some News. You never spelled out exactly what it was, only that it wasn't Good--I wondered whether the entire charade was just a play for Time and that you were sullen for no other reason than that you just don't eat.

So, will You be the One to tell me the Joke is on me, or do I get to have the last laugh? (I couldn't make this stuff up even if I tried).

**It appears that a noncontrovertible prerequisite to holding this office (of Witness/Martyr) is to Never have anyone's blood on your hands (anything to the contrary and know that someone is lying to you sister/brother)

Sea, Earth, and Sky